What language does Australia speak?

WARNING: This post gets a lil crass, so don’t show it to the kiddies. (That means you G, look away).

Studying Mandarin in multiple cities has given me an insight into how language shifts from location to location. People may believe they are speaking the same language, but the words are not the same. So, now I am in Australia for the week and fell like I am learning English all over again. Some of it is a bit of clever advertising, but the rest???

First up I saw a sign in a store saying, “Cure Sore Balls.” I have to admit I was definitely caught looking at this sign. The only problem? It is an ad for helping women with sore feet after wearing high heels. Not sure I am the demographic they were looking for.

Next is the “NapiSan.” Having come from Chicago I was already familiar with the famously well known, “NapiHeads,” but NapiSan? Turns out it is diaper (nappy) detergent. Guess we have an alternative if we ever run out of our own.

When I went for a run I found I figured out what the MCG (Melbourne Cricket Grounds) is. The most interesting thing at this sporting venue is the entry marked “Passout Entry.” What? How drunk do the Aussies get before a cricket match that they have to divide the crowd into Sober, Drunk, Still Ugly, and Passed Out? Good on ya for letting them still attend though. Guess no one misses a match down under.

Just when I thought it was over, I saw one more sign. It is a simple sign. A construction company’s sign. If this is your company’s name and you do not produce porn videos, please change it.

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